Steve’s lips are limp and unsure when Bucky presses his own against him. Bucky tries not to crowd him—doesn’t want to scare him off—but he puts his hands on Steve’s waist like he’d do with a sweet girl his mother introduced him to. He kisses him gently, sweetly—short.
Like clockwork, Steve’s hands fist in Bucky’s shirtfront. He ducks his head to break their connection, then shoves Bucky backward.
“Shit,” Bucky breathes, while his blood leaves his face. He scrambles for an excuse. Anything that might keep him innocent too. “Steve—”
He tries to offer Steve his space, but Steve’s fists are locked in the fabric of his shirt. He holds Bucky in the place and breathes out hard. His eyes are screwed shut when he says, “I wish you hadn’t done that.”
“I’m sorry,” Bucky says, half-frantic. “Steve.”
“I thought you were different. I thought you might be my friend.”
“Steve, I am. I am your friend—Steve, look at me.”
When it happens, it turns out it’s not what he wanted. Steve’s eyes are daggers. “You think I didn’t know what all those guys at the gym say about me? I know they all think you’re sticking it in me. You think Morici’s the first person to say something? No. He’s just the first one to say it to you.”
“What?”
The breath that rips out of Steve’s chest is violent. “You really are stupid.”
“Steve—”
He rattles Bucky by the chest and then lets go of him. His face is flushed angry now. “Don’t try to save face, Barnes. You’re a bully and you’re chickenshit and I thought you were different, but you’re just making passes at me too.”
“Passes? Steve.”
Grabbing him is a mistake. “Don’t touch me!” he yells, yanking himself away hard enough his back hits the counter. When he finally looks at Bucky again to stare knives at him, his eyes have gone red and watery. He wipes a hand at his face but it’s too late; Bucky already saw the tears on his cheeks.
“Don’t touch me,” he repeats, hushed and rough.
Then he tears past Bucky, slams the door on his way out, and he’s gone.
“Why did you kiss me?”
Bucky hisses an inhale and looks around, but the locker room is lifeless. Last man standing, as always. “I don’t know,” he says.
“You’re a real ignoramus.” The kid is still glaring at the ground. He shakes his head. “I know what I look like, Barnes. I know all you assholes think I’ll just take it for you.”
“Rogers, please—”
“But nobody else ever said they wanted to kiss me.”
“Oh.” Bucky’s brow furrows—then smooths out into clean horror. “Hell. That was your first kiss?”
Steve’s nostrils flare. He won’t admit it but Bucky knows the truth when it’s plain in front of him.
“Steve, look at me, will you?” He just stares at the floor some more, so Bucky takes a step closer and reaches out. He half-expects Steve to snap teeth at him, but he doesn’t—when Bucky grips him by the shoulder, he slowly starts to lift his head. Their eyes finally meet, sky and sea. “I’m sorry they speak to you like that. I didn’t mean to treat you the same way. Swear it.”
Steve chews on that a while, searching Bucky’s face. “How did you mean to treat me?”
Bucky drops his hand back to his side. “I—didn’t. I made a mistake.”
“I don’t believe you really think that.”
“Why not?”
“Because of how you did it.”
“Alright. How was that?”
“Like in films.”
Hell. “You’re so young,” Bucky sighs, half to himself—but they’re still standing so close.
“I’m not. I told you, I’m—”
“Twenty, yeah, I know what you said.”
“And what, you don’t believe me?”
“No, I don’t.”
“Why do you give a damn anyway?”
Bucky hums and casts his eyes toward the ceiling, then back to Steve, who’s bristling around the edges now. “You got all this bravado, kid, I don’t know how you keep it up.”
“You don’t know me.”
“I’m very aware.”
Steve huffs out a breath and leaves it there, half-deflating. “It’s just that…”
“What? Just tell me.”
“Maybe I liked it.”
Fuck. “No.”
“Maybe we could—we could try it again,” Steve says. He looks up at Bucky through his thick fringe of lashes and—
He’s flirting. Trying to, anyway.
This conversation is going to give Bucky whiplash. “You just called me an asshole and said you didn’t want it.”
“From them, I don’t. I changed my mind about you.”
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