Angst in Hydra America

[art by maichan]

paint me in all my mistakes

written by RecoveringTheSatellites

art by maichan

Author's Summary:

Brooklyn, NY.

Seven years after HYDRA has usurped freedom and democracy, there are rules about personal liberty.

Rules about how to conduct yourself in public, and who to be, who to love, who not to love, and so on and so forth, down to which tattoos you can get. Bucky navigates this world like a sleepwalker, mostly detached from all inklings of emotion and reality, until he decides to get a tattoo.

And meets Steve.

[art by maichan808]

Excerpt:

“I wasn’t going to ask how you got these because it’s none of my business, but maybe it’s relevant after all.”  Steve’s voice is quiet, careful.  “Did you fight in the last battle?”

Bullets and dust and blood and death.  The death of most of his friends and life as they knew it.  Bucky nods.  

“I am so sorry.”  It sounds like Steve means it.  That he really is sorry.  He leans forward again, raises his hand, and looks at Bucky in question.

Bucky nods.

Steve lets his fingers map out the broken tissue again, without pressure this time, just a bare whisper of touch, and then says, “Maybe you want to celebrate them.  Take some of the pain of those memories away?”

Bucky gasps, because that’s exactly what he wants.  Exactly.

“I don’t want to hide them,” he says again, his voice no more than a breath.  “I just don’t want them to remind me of—”  That’s as far as he’ll go.  He can’t say more.

“I know what you mean.”  Steve pats his shoulder gently and then gets up to fetch his pencil and notepad.  “I can work with that.”

And as he starts to draw, Bucky wonders how Steve could possibly know what he means at all.