An Amazing Epic of a Fanfic

[by sumwilson,

excerpted from a

larger photoset]

One of the best and most accomplished fanfics that I have read to date is the 3-part series by spitandvinegar called "Ain't No Grave." The work is open to AO3 members only. Part 2 of the series contains the main story in 10 chapters and is the one discussed in this post.

"Ain't No Grave (Can Keep My Body Down)" by spitandvinegar -- Bucky is in rough, rough shape after he escapes from Hydra. Brain injured, plagued by physical tics, stammering and inexplicable outbursts of Russian or other foreign languages, he's also hooked on heroin as he self-medicates his unendurable pain. He makes tentative contact with Steve and begins a long and chaotic healing process.

The author is a skilled and talented writer, with an amazing ear for snappy dialogue. She expertly contrasts the different characteristics of Bucky as he oscillates between his various identities. Despite all the pain in the story, there are also moments of great levity, humour and some charming secondary characters, like the Goddamn Kids and Huang Fumei, the old Chinese woman who owns the dollar store where Bucky works doing odd jobs.

Excerpts:

[Chapter 1]

It's six in the morning, and Steve is heading out on a run when he nearly trips over a bouquet of sunflowers on the front steps of his brownstone.

For a second paranoia takes over, and he kicks the flowers a little, waiting for them to explode. They don't. They also came with a card, which he picks up. The front of the card has a tasteful picture of the Brooklyn bridge at sunset. It's very nice and sedate, like the kind of card you would buy to give to your boss. On the inside someone has written a short message in big, shaky block letters.

I AM SORRY FOR SHOOTING YOU.

Steve sits down hard on the steps.

. . . .

[Chaper 5]

John is a good employee. He works hard with no breaks, and he doesn't steal cigarettes or cough medicine from behind the counter, and he doesn't do any dope in the dollar store. He does get upset and go in the back room to shake for a while sometimes, or forget how to speak any language but Russian other times, but that's ok. No customers can see him in the back room, and he doesn't need to talk to put things onto the shelves. He does need to eat, though, so she makes extra zhou in the crockpot in the back room every morning so that they can have it for lunch. They understand each other, because both of them have bad teeth.

Then one day a cop comes looking for him.

He's not in uniform, but she can tell that he's a cop. He stands like a cop and walks like a cop, and he looks around the dollar store with sharp eyes like he's looking for someone to arrest. He's a big good-looking blond-haired man, like the kind of cop that they put in posters with a black cop and a woman cop with words saying that they're your friends and won't shoot you.

Huang Fumei doesn't like cops. They're always arresting her customers, and that's bad for business.

He pretends that he is looking at shampoo. She says, “Today is special offer on Suave brand, buy one get one free.”

He looks interested.

Then he says, “I, um, I'm looking for a guy who works here. John? Is he here?”

She says, “Are you here to arrest him, or is he a snitch?”

He blinks. “I was planning on taking him out for lunch. He said he has a break at two.”

He's a snitch.

“He never takes it,” she says. “He's a good employee.” Then she shouts toward the back room in Chinese. “John! There's a man here who says he is taking you to lunch and won't arrest you!”

John comes out of the back room. He says, “Hey.”

The cop smiles at him. It's a big, happy smile. He says, “Hey, Buck. Ready to go?”

This cop is gay for his snitch. That's no good for him at all. He could lose his job. Then they would have to find a new cop to put on the posters.

John smiles back at him. He says, “Yeah, just l-l-l-let me get my jacket, champ.”

This cop and this junkie are gay for each other.

When John gets back from his date she says, “You are gay for that cop. That's ok. Huang Ayi is a modern person. I don't care if my employees are gays. But when his other cop friends come to arrest you, make sure they don't arrest you in the dollar store. That's bad for business.”

. . . .

[Chapter 6]

Steve says, “Don't apologize,” and cards his fingers into Bucky's hair. Buck gives a surprised little groan of pleasure, then wraps his metal hand around the back of Steve's neck to haul him in for a kiss. He's touching himself too, now, jerking himself off with his human hand, and the sight and sound of it sends dizzy shocks through Steve's whole body. Bucky breaks the kiss, presses their foreheads together.

“Sweetheart,” he says. “My guy, my gorgeous little guy with his smart f-fucking mouth, Christ, such a fucking idiot I was, saying no to you. Used to think about c-coming home and pulling you into my lap, such a p-perfect fucking armful you were, tough as fucking nails, would have taken it so good for me, honey, would've been so good to you, taken such good care of you, fucked you so sweet, given you what you needed, would've made you moan for me, sweetheart. You haven't fucking changed, haven't changed a goddamn b-b-bit where it counts, babydoll. You know who takes care of you, sweetheart?”

“You,” Steve says, and when he talks it's 1939. “You do, Buck, ain't no one else, swear to God, never been no one else I wanted for a minute like I want you, never a minute, I'll do whatever you want, Buck, cook and sew for you, shine your shoes, be on my knees for you when you get home, just tell me, tell me you want me and you got me – ”

“Jesus Christ,” Buck says and then they're kissing again, sloppy and desperate, and Steve comes, and Bucky follows not long after.

[Illustration for Ain't No Grave

by artgroves (albymangroves)]